Whether it’s hiding new purchases or lying about money, financial infidelity can be very damaging to relationships. Talking money with your significant other can be a sensitive, boring topic, but it certainly pays to be aware of what’s going on. Check out these signs of financial infidelity to make sure you’re both on the same money page.
SIGN 1: Decisions are made solo
If only one person in the relationship is aware of all financial matters, passwords and cash flow, with no input from the other, it’s time to reassess. Not only is it unfair that one person’s left in the dark (willingly or not), it could cause a whole lot of drama if things do turn sour. Both partners should be involved in finances and budgeting.
This doesn’t mean all accounts need to be joint, just making time to sit down and talk about money regularly. Even better, set up a joint budgeting tool so both parties can see what’s going in and out.
SIGN 2: Secret spending
Excessive spending on things which are then hidden is a relationship sin that lots of us are guilty of. Ripping the tag off new items immediately so your partner doesn’t notice them, hiding purchases and secret credit cards can all do damage to a couple’s finances and relationship. If overspending is hidden because of feelings of guilt or fear the other partner will disapprove, the solution could be as simple as maintaining separate accounts for personal indulgences.
SIGN 3: Secret saving
If you come across secret bank accounts or money your partner has stashed away, it’s important to consider all possibilities before jumping the gun. After all, they could be could be squirrelling away money for a holiday or present for you, so don’t get too accusatory too soon.
However, stashing away money on the sly can also be a symptom of a bigger problem. If one partner has different money habits to the other – one’s a spender and one’s a saver – it can be a tricky process to get onto the same page. Have an open and frank discussion about how you both manage money and come to an arrangement you both feel comfortable with.
SIGN 4: Money lies
Blatant lying about money earned, saved, spent and outstanding debts is never a good look. Along with this is lying about an inheritance or trust fund, not being honest about getting fired or a pay rise, and even lying about a gambling habit. Be as transparent as possible, even about outstanding debts you’ve incurred over the years. It’ll be easier to tackle early than let it build up over time.
SIGN 5: Not talking about money
Just as bad as lying about money is not talking about it at all. Excessive secrecy or changing the topic when finances come up should ring alarm bells. It might not be the sexiest topic, but it’s crucial to get comfortable talking about money with your significant other. So find a good time, be willing to compromise and know where you stand.