10 Jobs that Actually Exist in the Ridic World We Live In

As the tired old saying goes, do what you love and you’ll never work a day in your life. Well for the lucky mongrels that get to do these jobs, that adage is almost certainly a reality. Here’s 10 jobs we wish we had.


Luxury Bed Tester


Getting paid to sleep? Yeah mad.

In 2009, a 22-year-old English student was paid around $1,700 per month to sleep in a different luxury bed every night and share her thoughts afterwards.

You’d quite literally be making money in your sleep.


Private Island Caretaker


Essentially, you’d be assuming the role of Groundskeeper Willie for an entire, beautiful island owned by some variety of billionaire.

With a salaries ranging between $20,000 to $70,000 per year for caretakers, it’s the kind of job where money takes a back seat to, you know, living on a god damn island paradise.

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 Wine/Beer Taster & Blogger


If you’ve got the palate, you can get a job tasting just about anything, but let’s be real, we’re all in it for the sauce.

Whether it’s a crisp savvy B or a schooner of delicious lager, being able to hit the piss every day for a living sounds pretty sweet.

And you could give it a go right now if you really wanted to. Start your own blog and review the crap outta some bevvies, but you’ll need to be good at it to make any money.


Chocolate consultant


Again, palates and stuff. If you know your way around a block of chocolate, then people might actually pay you to tell them what you think.

Although it is a job that could potentially make you fat or give you diabetes. Proceed with caution.


Waterslide tester


We jest you not, this is an actual job.

Paying around $40,000 per annum, the job is pretty much what it says on the box. You test waterslides at your own peril.

Of course, you don’t get to take a break in the colder months, which is likely to be the only downside to a rather riveting career. Shaka brah!


Weed & Sex Journalist


Do you like to smerk-a-berl? Do you like to do the sex, too? Well then ya best sign up for this bloody cracker of a job.

The Cannabist is part of The Denver Post and has covered all things weed since it’s recent legalisation.

One such column covers getting high and having sex, which sounds like quite the occupation. As a close second, you could also score a job as a Weed Reviewer. Yes, this is the world we live in.

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Fortune Cookie Writer


Do you ever find yourself offering quality wisdom in the form of a single sentence? For around $65,000, you could make a full-time job out of it.

Not a bad salary for biscuit publishing.


Video Game Tester


Playing video games all day. It’s the dream, right?

Sure, but it has the potential to be a nightmare, too. You’d have to play the same game over and over again, not to mention carrying out super mundane tasks like walking to every single inch of the map to check for bugs.

All we’re saying is, prepare for the possibility of falling out of love with gaming. 


Pornography Historian


Ex porn star William Margold went from being in front of the camera to having a professional gander ever since. He has directed a documentary on the porn industry and generally just studies the history of people doing the deed on camera.

Every 15-year-old’s dream job, basically.


Panda Nanny


You’ll have to move to China for this one, but it’s totally worth it.

The China Giant Panda Protection and Research Centre offers the position of Panda Nanny, which entails taking care of and hanging out with these rad little dudes. YES PLS.

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