Claims of Market Manipulation in Avocado Scandal

Alright, don’t panic, but we’re in the midst of an avocado shortage. I know, I know, it’s hard, but you may need to come to terms with paying a little extra for your ~trendy~ breakfast.

But the plot, it thickens. Avocado producers in Western Australia have been accused of playing the market before the holiday season, resulting in a nationwide shortage of the superfood.

Anthony Allen, former chief executive of Avocados Australia says that producers sent excessive amounts of the fruit at artificially lowered prices before Christmas to enhance sales. Scandalous!

Rainfall and bushfires have also contributed to the shortage, lifting prices to $4 a pop in supermarkets and $7 in some smaller stores. Bit bloody spenno, m8.

WA Avocado Growers Association chairman Wayne Franceschi acknowledges the shortage, but denies that the farmers were doing dodgies, instead blaming inclement weather.

“Cooler conditions are superb but there have been bushfires, which shut down roads and made things a little more difficult. Then when the weather is really hot, you risk sunburning, which is another detriment.”

An event that is sure to rock trendy cafes to their very core, hipsters across the country are being charged greatly for their avo on toast, a scandal dubbed fittingly as avocadogate.

Will the shortage continue? We will have to wait and see, but you can take solace in the fact that the precious fruit thrives in cooler temperatures. Viva la winter!