Everyone lets their guard down once at work once in a while.
But no matter how tempting it might be to share what’s on your mind during Friday night drinks, or how close you think you are to your colleague, there are some things you should never talk about with people you work with. Seriously.
Your sex life
Despite how hot you think you are, (which in reality, is probably not very, if you have to keep talking about it) no-one wants to hear about what you got up to last night with your partner/date/stranger/neighbour/self. Especially not the people who have to work with you every day.
It’s uncomfortable, unnecessary and unprofessional. So keep it in your pants and in your mind, at least during the nine-to-five.
One of the greatest mysteries of the modern office is what everyone else is earning.
No matter how tempting it is to tell colleagues about the great wicket you’re on, or to casually ask them how they’re faring, this one is better left unsaid. If you’re privy to confidential information, do your job and keep it confidential.
No good can come from knowing how much your colleagues make, because whether you’re earning more or less than them, it’s going to be awkward. If word gets out you’re earning twice as much as your desk mates, kiss that casual environment goodbye and say hi to your new resentful buddies.
And if they’re earning more than you, you’re going to feel pretty undervalued and upset.
Your job hunt
So you’ve spent the past few weeks applying for jobs and have an interview lined up next week. Great. But before you shout it from the rooftops, shut it.
Firstly, your co-workers don’t care. They’ll either be jealous that you’ve got a shot at getting out of the hellhole you all work in, or will feel betrayed by the fact you’re moving onto bigger and better things.
Secondly, there’s a chance you might not get the job anyway, which means people have to work with you knowing you openly want to GTFO.
Thirdly, if the boss gets wind of the fact you’ve mentally resigned, they might tell you to peace out, and you’ll be left with no job prospects at all. So keep your job hunt to yourself, at least until you’ve given notice, the boss knows and it’s all official.
Politics and religion
Ah, the magic combination. There’s nothing as divisive as these two firecrackers, and while healthy debate is always a good thing, it’s best left for outside the office.
No-one wants to feel ganged up on or personally attacked at work, and an innocent chat about politics or religion can quickly turn sour.
This doesn’t mean hiding your views or religion, but try and use your brain to mouth filter next time you think you’ve got something to say.
Every office has a resident tool (fingers crossed it’s not you).
But if it is, you know those homophobic, racist, sexist jokes you think are funny? Chances are other people don’t feel the same way.
And if you’re not the one saying them but you’re still laughing along, you’re part of the problem. Be a tool all you like in your own time, but work isn’t the place to share the latest poor-taste joke you’ve heard.
If you’re offended by jokes or comments from your boss or co-workers, call them out, refuse to laugh and let them know.
There are lots of lols to be had at work from jokes that don’t offend anyone. If you’re unsure, play it safe.